A few days ago a post on Mastodon caught my eye, posted under the content warning “unexpected lewd at the grocery store”. I’m not linking to it here because I can’t remember the privacy settings of the 2 other participants.

My wife brought both these home 18 months ago; Cock soup is fine, I’ve had it a few times since (giggling each time) and Shito sauce is something everyone must try at least once in their lives.

I liked the Shito so much I took it into work in case anyone wished to share my unfettered joy and give the jar a good home. I felt so lucky when my colleagues only sampled it, such was their love for me.

Anyway, I was moved to take this photo.

I won our 3-person office NFL ‘Pickem’ this year. We each had to try to correctly predict more winners than the others from every game, every week throughout the 18-week regular season. It’s not a trivial pursuit, it’s not just guessing a result by looking at what other people are thinking.

Before we started none of us really spent time choosing a reward from the others for gaining the ultimate victory.

Anyway one of the guys pushed me a bit for an answer, and so did the other. And today, one brought in his treasured shiny hipflask with something special sloshing gently inside. For me to try.

It’s a ‘Longrow’ 18 year old single malt.

And I’m just about to take my first sip.

And I’m going to make the most of it.

I don’t know much about whiskies or whiskeys, but I do know, when I’ve tried one, what I like.

It smells perfect. It’s peaty, which I like. Love.

Ideally, and it seems extraordinarily churlish of me to say this given the circumstances, my choice would be a Laphroaig 15 year old – probably the most rounded (most polarising) whisky I’ve ever tried. But the price went silly after the company withdrew it then brought it back. It would have been silly to even ask for a miniature bottle.

Ok, I’m going to sample this ‘water of life’ neat from my 20 year old ‘Glencairn’ glass – a most-treasured present from my wife 3 days after we got together.

Please don’t be disappointed that I’m not briniging you an evocation of a Scottish loch in the autumn, crushed walnuts or burning tyre smoke. Naah, it’s unlikely I’d be able to separate stuff out like someone trained in this sniffing, sipping, swirling thing.

I cup the glass across my fingers and palm, take a long sniff, swirl, sniff, anticipation, sip. Think.

Same again, swill it round the old gums. Think.

Feel it going down. Think.

It’s a really good-sized measure this.

Because I’m bloody-well worth it!

Anyway, as an experience after almost-exclusively drinking Bud Light for the last couple of years it’s beyond my ability to describe.

Honestly, I’m not keen on the aftertaste. The initial taste though is awesome, and as it grabs the gums adds to the ‘experience’ a drink costing almost the absolute top end of my limit back when I had…

It slides down really really well too. Really well. Did I mention that already?

I can’t wait to sniff the empty glass in the morning. Trust me if you’ve never tried it, just have a go. I first did it with a Maker’s Mark – a whiskey I hated from the very first sip.

I feel nice and warm now. Nice. Warm.

Onto the second half then.

Cheers!

I’d better remember to give the hipflask a bit of a polish before handing it back, but I’m not washing it out.

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Some context:

A post from 2016: ‘Hic‘.

One from 2017: ‘Drunkard‘.

A bit later in 2017: ‘Makers Mark review part 6‘.

(Impromptu earlier, but was eventually very tasty.)

Ingredients:

• The remains of a roasted chicken, preferably with some meat and skin left on;
• Roasted potatoes;
• Cooked carrots;
• Cooked broccoli;
• Slice of bread, white squishy;
• Vegetable stock cube;
• Jalapeño chilli jam (best measured from a squeezy bottle);
• Tomato ketchup, squeezy;
• Rosemary, from a spice pot;
• Salt, to taste;
• Pepper, a tiny amount.

Preparation:

1. Boil half a pan of water in a kettle,
2. Dump the chicken into the saucepan,
3. Cook it to a rolling boil then let simmer for a while,
4. When the colour of the liquid evens out then sieve the solids out from the pan over another, separate out the meat and return it and the liquid to the main pan, and discard the bones, skin & cartilage*,
5. Add the stock cube and rosemary to the main pan and continue to simmer,
6. Add the potato, carrots & broccoli and boil until simmering again, then then turn down the heat,
7. Add the bread (to thicken), making sure it’s thoroughly mixed in,
8. Add the chilli jam and ketchup, both a single circular squirt,
9. Er…
10. Eat!

*Tried at this point it’s a bit weak and watery, but at least it tastes of chicken.

Due to the generosity of a man I cannot name to protect his identity[efn_note]But whose name is a homophone of a 'Wallace & Gromit' character.[/efn_note] I am the lucky recipient of a white Twix. 2 fingers too!

Arriving at work today with 30p and needing >70 to buy nearly everything in the confounded snack machine, the man arrived at precisely the right time.

I shall savour it during the next 2 working hours.

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Addendum: After some time I caved and ate half a finger. It took 3/4 hour for it all to go. And the verdict?

…

Worth what I paid.

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