Category: food

Wild Turkey

The Wild Turkey brand of straight Bourbon whiskey is well-enough established in the film world that I thought I ought to give it a whirl.

I have to say the first glass was interesting, but of the two Bourbons I've tried I do prefer Buffalo Trace.

It's hard to argue with '101 proof' though.

Oh, my gums, my lips!

Hungry

In the hurry to leave the house for this morning's school run and journey to work I forgot my lunch, I forgot cash (the cash my wife got for me yesterday evening) and…

Having nothing edible in my desk drawer for the first time in weeks I'm sat here now looking at a vending machine 'Hot chicken soup', and wondering if its calorific value will be adequate to sustain me for the next 5 hours.

Hey, a bonus, this time it's actually not heated water with bits of green stuff floating on the surface layer of micro-froth.

(sips slowly, smacks lips, mmmm…)

Bourbon

Ah… I remember the days when getting home and having one meant chomping on a nice, brown biscuit sandwiching a buttercream filling: the Bourbon Cream.

Nowadays I see and hear an amber-coloured liquid sloshed carefully into a thistle-shaped glass, with an ice cube lovingly plopped on top. Things are very different now.

Stop Making Sense

Aw crap, the cat's looking at me in that way again. Not sure where my uncontrollable giggling came from there, but he's right to look askance.

Or am I not sure‽

Ok, ok. Buffalo Trace Kentucky Straight Bourbon Whiskey with a single ice cube in a thistle-shaped glass bought for me by my wife-to-be on March 26th 2005, accompanied very loudly indeed by The Pump Panel remix of New Order's 'Confusion' and then Talking Heads' Stop Making Sense album, they might be something to do with it. The latter songs take me back, what…

Forty.

Years.

To the time I first heard 'em.

1977 seems a bit early though, being honest. 35 years ago is maybe getting there, around the time of the best music documentary film ever. That seems a bit short though, I'm sure I heard 'em first before they became popular in the UK. Maybe. Dunno.

Shut up Barrie.

#beendrinking

Pineapple

** Newsflash!! **

Dateline: Right now!

I just ate a couple of slices of a Hawaiian pizza I bought for my girls.

(pause for effect…)

And I liked it.

Yes, I introduced a foodstuff (pineapple) positioned diametrically opposite to my views on the addition of fruit to savoury meals. One I'd purchased outwith the normal weekly shop…

Heck, I even carried the thing up the icy path from the village!

I'm not averse to foodstuffs prepared in challenging ways but pineapple is one of those polarising fruits; tolerable in isolation, downright wrong on a pizza. Or with gammon.*

It would appear that 2016 is shaping up to be a year of experimentation, even compromise.

*Gammon with egg FTW!

Drunkard

Today, for lots of reasons, I felt the need for a little alcoholic refreshment, and so it happened that I had half a glass of coffee liqueur; from a small, thistle-shaped whisky glass bought for me in March 26 2005 by the lovely vibrant lady who was destined to be my poor, downtrodden wife and the mother of my 2 girls, 2 cats and a dog.

I've been practically teetotal for a few years now even by my standards; I've always been a lightweight, never needed alcohol, never had the bladder or ambulatory capacity to soak up the stuff. A few stubby bottles, maybe once or twice a day until they're gone; a bottle of whisky that lasts weeks; and all with extended periods between simply because I've not needed booze.

I manfully resisted the allure, the convenience of and 'Amazon Prime Now' shop earlier, knowing that I don't need it today. I never have done.

But today, today it was indeed appropriate; I had the half glass, washed it out and left it to drain. In a few minutes I shall have another, and then call it quits.

If I can still understand the voice in my head telling me I don't need it, that is.

Toblerone

A Toblerone bar has the enviable position of being a luxury product for a lot of people; velvety-smooth with chewy sweetness on the tongue, idiosyncratic in design, and with a long, long history.

There's the expectation that, once one figures out how to open the box, breaking off a piece of nougat-speckled chocolate will be difficult. The ever-present fear of broken teeth, the danger inherent in inexpertly wielded knives whilst attempting block separation; it's all part of a process distinct from eating any other chocolate.

But tradition is a powerful thing.

As the cost of production and ingredients inevitably increases, and the pack size reduction is touted, spurious, as bringing health benefits, companies invent ways to cut corners, mainly by decreasing pack size whilst maintaining the amount the customer pays. In reducing the manufacturing costs the logical choice would have been to reduce the length of the bars. Competing 'staple' bars have already set a precedent.

But no. The company looks to have removed every other peak from the bars. The result is frankly ridiculous.

Its obvious whoever signed off on it had no idea of the repercussions. Premium products surely mandate price increases?

If, for instance, the Coca-Cola company decided to alter the recipe there'd be uproar. Ok, that's a bad example; whilst the Toblerone recipe may not have been touched, generations of gift-givers and receivers have expectations of CONTINUITY.

Tradition, continuity, expectation; killed at a stroke.

I'm not impressed. I'll be interested to see whether there's an embarrassed climb-down in the near future, or whether the brand'll simply disappear – rationalised out of existence by the parent company as a product of a bygone age.

Toblerone: 1908-?

Kebab

I went online and ordered a kebab and a few other things earlier. 'Twas delicious, but bloody hell that sauce was a bit spicy!

A riddle:

My first is in 'Internet',

My second is in 'lounge',

My third is in 'eating',

My fourth is in 'full',

My fifth is in 'gurgle',

My last is in, er… I'll be right back!

Phew!

So what am I… ?

Yeah, ok, I'm sat on the toilet for a bit.

Will use again. Why? Life: a series of paradoxes linked together by uncertainty. Its good to be grounded every once in a while.