"Indistinctly loquacious": to which UK politician am I imprecisely referring?
Describe them without a name or the attributes/characteristics commonly used in the media. Or don't bother wasting your time.
All posts by @bazbt3
Educated
Last week daughter 1 had a sex education lesson, or at least one on the specifics of the human male reproductive system. No problem there. She mentioned the teacher had used a couple of words veering more towards the colloquial than the technical. I became intrigued, because yeah!
The first, describing the male organ, began with a ‘W’, she said. It was easy to simply say ‘willy’, though my wife and I know quite a few more.
The second word up proved to be somewhat problematic, at least to me. It begins with an ‘S’ and is something that emits from the above appendage.
So I did it, I went there, with “ā¦is it a movement of rebellion which started in the late seventies, one characterised by people with spiky hairstyles and outlandish make-up who jumped up and down, spat at each other, and sang songs of disillusionment and hate of the establishment? Is it ‘punks’, rearranged?”
“ā¦?”
My wife jumped to the rescue way too late to stop my squirming. The speed of her response was surely intentional, throwing in the simple phrase “ā¦is it men who go to sea?”
Yes, yes it was indeed that one.
VE Day 2020
Next year, to commemorate the 75th anniversary of the end of hostilities against the Axis powers in Europe during World War 2, the UK government has announced that VE Day (Victory in Europe) will replace the early May Bank Holiday for most.
In 2020 it’s on Friday May 8th, after the Monday of the Jedi’s annual celebration on what would have been the UK Bank Holiday. I can feel a distuā¦ need for a 3 day working week!
More here (it’s the first link I found, please don’t judge me):
www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/bank-holiday-monday-moving-friday-16479438
Incompetents (Tories)
The Nasty Party has, in my eyes, sunk to a new low point of incompetence. Faced with a small number of party leadership candidates they’re whining it’s too many, it’s unmanageable.
This is a group of people democratically elected by a majority to govern a country and to deal with matters on an international stage, and they simply can’t comprehend how to deal with 13 hopefuls (may increase to >17 during the week.) One proposed solution: change the rules to stop this frankly appalling scenario in future; another: change the number of triaging votes per week to get it over as quickly as possible.
Did they think that offering up the Prime Minister’s job would not generate massive interest, especially as there is for the second time no need to win a General Election to get it? My view, they thought no-one would want the poisoned chalice apart from the expected incompetents.
ā¦and voters trust them to lead the country through these turbulent times? That’s not a question, it’s a statement. We’ve gone from a country of characteristic political apathy and a deep mistrust of every politician, to one which believes KNOWS things will be better after March 29 April 12 October 31ā¦ over three effing years after we should have had a plan in place!
And if that’s not the case, that there’s an element of trust, then the prevailing mood is “let’s get it over with as fast as we can”, without any thought of the future or even immediate impact across every facet of our lives.
I for one shall welcome our American overlords with an open wallet; I’m looking forward to: eating salmonella-free chicken and larger-than-life steaks, relishing the thought of reduced-cocoa chocolate that smells of sick, selling off the loss-making NHS in favour of an honestly capitalist free market in health insurance and looser rules on medicine pricing and, for my daughters’ sake, a relaxation of gun controls that’ll surely eradicate the knife crime epidemic sweeping our once-great nationā¦ oh yeah baby, bring it on!
Flop
Redherring underpants: so comfortable you'd hardly know they were there. And, measured by one important yardstick, they often aren't.
Not necessarily a design flaw, merely a use case the designer failed to consider. The button is oddly placed for a man of my, erā¦ stature, the main consequence of which is that throughout the day I occasionally flop out. Not protrude or stick out, no. Flop.
It's not a pleasant feeling, but it's not entirely unpleasant either, knowing that a change in posture will precipitate a contact with one's outer garment. The very worst situation (if I'm being honest 'worst' is exaggeration) occurs when I'm neither in nor out.
Enough words, I just got changed into my dressing gown, it's more predictable even when moving the bins to the front of the house on collection day in high winds!
Grumpy Cat RIP
Grumpy Cat is dead. (BBC)
A life in pictures. (The Guardian)
Official announcement tweet. (@realgrumpycat)
White Twix
Due to the generosity of a man I cannot name to protect his identity[efn_note]But whose name is a homophone of a 'Wallace & Gromit' character.[/efn_note] I am the lucky recipient of a white Twix. 2 fingers too!
Arriving at work today with 30p and needing >70 to buy nearly everything in the confounded snack machine, the man arrived at precisely the right time.
I shall savour it during the next 2 working hours.
Addendum: After some time I caved and ate half a finger. It took 3/4 hour for it all to go. And the verdict?
ā¦
Worth what I paid.
May(field) 6
It's the first time I've read this:
https://www.si.com/nfl/2018/04/18/baker-mayfield-2018-nfl-draft-quarterbacks
I went with 2 other QBs at pick 1 in the 2018 Draft, which is why I've not bothered following it or the trades this year; I'm waiting until the Browns trim their roster to the regular season squad before I, erā¦ honestly, I'm not sure what right now.
Chewbacca: RIP Peter Mayhew
RIP Peter Mayhew.
/me mutters about a disturbance in the Forceā¦
Mine’s a big one
Just as the lady with the frankly massive puppies who lives at the end of the street has finally trimmed her bush I asked for and thus received a big one earlier today.
It ended poorly.
Now chai latte is an awesome drink but, as I believe I discovered earlier, only in moderation. I asked for a big one before we watched the film ‘Missing Link’. Unfortunately it appears it’s just too much for my otherwise iron constitution.[efn_note]A barefaced lie![/efn_note] So, yeahā¦
My stomach, it gurgles, a portent of doom down below; my wife advised me to bring a spare toilet roll up, just in case.
Whereas daughter 2 offered up 4-1/4, I’ll give ‘Missing Link’ 3-1/2 of 5 stars. Maybe my judgment will improve once I’veā¦